My mums always been a repressed new ager in a Lilith fair kind of way… but also in a weight watchers kind of way, more on that in later posts. When she saw me start to cry today for instance she said “ maybe we should see a naturopath” she was referring to the fact that my immune system is so weakened by stress and I’ve had the flu all weekend.

The one thing she told me that really stuck with me though, because she said it looking deep into my eyes I’d like to share with you, as it my reason for the blog …

I had completed, under some duress my college education, bless the girlfriends who actually helped me to complete projects. Bless them for recognizing my need to body double and my then undiagnosed adhd which was waging war on my education at every turn. My parents insisted this was a steppingstone and I should now choose a university to study at. I’m grateful for this opportunity although I struggled so hard to manage the expectations and responsibility I have always been grateful.

You have to sort of audition for art school, not only by presenting your portfolio of work but through an interview process. With the goal in sight my mother told me “ you have to be honest to be an artist, you have to be completely honest”.

It struck me immediately and forever after the juxtaposition this was to our culture. Our familial culture, our wider culture. Throughout my university journey I was met with contempt at my portrait of residential schools system- I was told if that number of murders were true there would be government documentation… I presented specific instances of over-fishing through projected graphics this was met with boredom… an uncontroversial truth. right. What kind of honesty could I present that was digestible, that would cause reflection.

And throughout the discourse of the last several years in the political and human realm while I too struggle to survive under the current conditions, I see the personal and political intertwine as I always have but now so tangible so real.

I’ve always been told I’m too real and unfortunately I can’t claim any badassery for that. It’s a function of the ADHD which makes me highly attuned to injustice and relentless in finding the cause to lead way to the solution.

I’m going to be very honest and real and take whatever backlash comes with that. Honestly in this life will free us from the pain we’re suffering, you need not know one but to love them. Stories are valuable I have stories and they speak to our times in history and I’m going to put them down.